Skip to main content

THE UNSPOKEN; Childlessness


Most people enter into marriages without knowing each other's fertility status , no one even thinks about this in the courtship stage.
They are either busy being in love with each other or focusing on getting married that they are not able to think about what happens next.
This therefore leads to divorces, infidelity, abusive or spiteful relationships where regret follows when they are confronted with the problem.

How do you avoid the situation altogether?..
  • In the courtship stage when things seem to be getting more serious, it's best to talk to your partner about the issue.
  •  Find out how they feel about kids and if they could handle being childless. Talk about what each of you would do in such a scenario and it's best to be as honest as possible with each other. Explore your options in the case this ever happens to you in the course of your marriage.
  • You should also both get examined by a doctor to determine your fertility status. You are able to make decisions as early as then in case one of the partners is either barren or impotent. This will help to avoid problems that might arise when the problem is discovered much later in the marriage.
What if it is too late and you are already long into the marriage when you discover this?..

Communication is KEY at this point because you need to address the situation with an open mind and in a civil manner. Whatever decision is made concerning the issue should be made TOGETHER and if you both can't handle it then you should consider bringing in a third party that is neutral and views the matter objectively.

So what's the procedure?..
  • You first need to figure out what and where the problem is. This involves going to a doctor together and getting checked so you both find out exactly what is causing the issue. This should be done together so that you are both facing the situation together at every stage.
  • After establishing the root of the issue, get to find out the possible solutions to the problem. Explore the options you have.
  • Decide if you are both willing to to give your available options a chance and which options you would like to try out. Keep in mind that if one partner is not into giving it a try  it won't work out. 
  • Here your options could be like; waiting on the Lord if it's from a religious perspective or trying different positions, foods, medication from a medical perspective and probably other psychic or traditional methods.
  • If you are both willing to give your options a try then patience is very important because it might take a while before you actually see results. So you need to keep encouraging each other and talking about how you are feeling so that you are able to move together.
  •  Let's say either one or both of the partners are unwilling to keep trying or have given up. You could consider adoption or for a more traditional approach, bringing in a third party e.g second wife who is able to bear children.
  • Marriage is "for better for worse" and "till death" so it's best to stick to your vows and try and make it work even if  it means you have to stay together childless till your old ages .
  • But on the other hand it might be causing more harm than good, you might be getting violent or ending up hating each other as a result of frustration. When it gets to this point it's best to part ways. 'If you love them you gotta be able to let them go.' 

This is a very critical issue and can really take a toll on a couple so it really needs to be handled well lest it destroy both partners.

Keep holding on 🤗








Comments

Post a Comment

Must Reads

Man Up!

Word around town is that totally straight dudes are finding it hard to behave like the men they are. We can't have straight dudes behaving like chics!! Dr. 💚 just had to step in!! So..there are those dudes who just find it hard to man up in relationships; could be they are the shy type, they are so in love they don't know how to behave...but not anymore..Geejay to the rescue!! So here is a little secret you need to know..."Its the little acts that count!" You don't need a great deal of courage to pull it off. Lower your voice I used to see most of my dude acquaintances do this when they talked to chics. I kept on asking why but no one told me. I embarked on my mini research and found this out; the silent dudes who are not so loud and noisy are the most attractive, they say little but the little they say has quite a lot of impact. Try lowering your voice but not too much such that they have to struggle so much to get what you are saying, just enough t...
Post a Comment
Read more

wait😇 OR settle😐

I recently saw something that sent chills down my spine. You see the way people nowadays hold up signs saying "I need a job" , well that one said "I need a husband" . It got me thinking of what could have possibly led to this situation and how to evade it.. Fun💃🍸 In their twenties, most girls are always saying NO to dudes that are interested in something serious with them especially when words like; marriage, future, kids are used. They'd rather 'enjoy' in relationships that aren't serious because they are either afraid of commitment or feel like they are still too young to think of the future. By the time they are finally ready to settle down, all the husbands have already been taken and they become frustrated and desperate. My take; Mental stability is all you need to go into a relationship. There is no specific age. Do not be             afraid to get into it when you feel you are mature enough to handle one. Remember this is   ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Men Are Loyal, Not Faithful

Men have so many times been likened to dogs🐶 and thinking of it..it kinda is accurate. See dogs are loyal and always come back to their masters/owners at the end of the day. They however have multiple partners; basically any female counterpart. It’s something that’s just in them. Men are naturally visual creatures 😵 and they love challenges. A man will go for a lady just because they like what they see and they thrill from the challenge of pursuing the lady. This is not because they aren’t satisfied in their relationship or don’t love anymore. It’s just the thrill of it…they mostly can’t help themselves…something to do with masculinity. Most chics like to think and believe that their guy is faithful to them as they haven’t caught them yet or they just can’t imagine it.   This just means that they are very careful or respect the chic so much as not to do it in their face. Of course a guy will take the necessary measures to cover up, giving you enough attention, clearing...
Post a Comment
Read more