Skip to main content

THE UNSPOKEN; Childlessness


Most people enter into marriages without knowing each other's fertility status , no one even thinks about this in the courtship stage.
They are either busy being in love with each other or focusing on getting married that they are not able to think about what happens next.
This therefore leads to divorces, infidelity, abusive or spiteful relationships where regret follows when they are confronted with the problem.

How do you avoid the situation altogether?..
  • In the courtship stage when things seem to be getting more serious, it's best to talk to your partner about the issue.
  •  Find out how they feel about kids and if they could handle being childless. Talk about what each of you would do in such a scenario and it's best to be as honest as possible with each other. Explore your options in the case this ever happens to you in the course of your marriage.
  • You should also both get examined by a doctor to determine your fertility status. You are able to make decisions as early as then in case one of the partners is either barren or impotent. This will help to avoid problems that might arise when the problem is discovered much later in the marriage.
What if it is too late and you are already long into the marriage when you discover this?..

Communication is KEY at this point because you need to address the situation with an open mind and in a civil manner. Whatever decision is made concerning the issue should be made TOGETHER and if you both can't handle it then you should consider bringing in a third party that is neutral and views the matter objectively.

So what's the procedure?..
  • You first need to figure out what and where the problem is. This involves going to a doctor together and getting checked so you both find out exactly what is causing the issue. This should be done together so that you are both facing the situation together at every stage.
  • After establishing the root of the issue, get to find out the possible solutions to the problem. Explore the options you have.
  • Decide if you are both willing to to give your available options a chance and which options you would like to try out. Keep in mind that if one partner is not into giving it a try  it won't work out. 
  • Here your options could be like; waiting on the Lord if it's from a religious perspective or trying different positions, foods, medication from a medical perspective and probably other psychic or traditional methods.
  • If you are both willing to give your options a try then patience is very important because it might take a while before you actually see results. So you need to keep encouraging each other and talking about how you are feeling so that you are able to move together.
  •  Let's say either one or both of the partners are unwilling to keep trying or have given up. You could consider adoption or for a more traditional approach, bringing in a third party e.g second wife who is able to bear children.
  • Marriage is "for better for worse" and "till death" so it's best to stick to your vows and try and make it work even if  it means you have to stay together childless till your old ages .
  • But on the other hand it might be causing more harm than good, you might be getting violent or ending up hating each other as a result of frustration. When it gets to this point it's best to part ways. 'If you love them you gotta be able to let them go.' 

This is a very critical issue and can really take a toll on a couple so it really needs to be handled well lest it destroy both partners.

Keep holding on 🤗








Comments

Post a Comment

Must Reads

The Shy Lover

Passion is a major part of a romantic relationship. It keeps the fire burning in the relationship, keeps the partners longing for each other. In this, partners explore their pleasures and seek to make each other happy and satisfied. So let's talk about the shy lover.. It may seem like they don't want or enjoy the pleasure or like they are giving mixed signals about what they want. They are like a puzzle you need to figure out and once the puzzle is figured out, it opens up a whole new world for both partners. Let's figure out this puzzle together... Lead Take the lead with a shy lover, initiate the pleasure. A shy lover can't initiate, they are scared they wont do it right , weak in that moment, self conscious about how they are perceived. They think about it in their minds but are unable to execute. One may think they aren't interested but that really isn't the case. Once the bolder partner takes the lead, the shy counterpart is able to follow and pic...
3 comments
Read more

Love Or Money

Back then, none of this mattered. It was mostly hookups by uncles and aunts or parents looking for suitable partners for their children who in most cases they had no say in the issue. They just had to accept whoever was deemed suitable for them. But now the 21st century has come with its own dilemma; it's either love or money that determines the lifelong partner. It's a touchy issue and people have their own views on the issue. I thought i should also drop mine on this awesome discussion. Why go with;                         LOVE  it's hard for love to die if it's true, so one can be assured of a loyal lifelong commitment love is a matter of the heart, you are able to understand each other soul to soul  love can withstand the test of time it's hard for the value of love to change..come to think of it, does love even have value?.. love makes one a better person love is magical..people in...
2 comments
Read more

How To Treat Her Special

Y'all dudes be like, 'how i treat her isn't really an issue, what matters the most is how i feel about her'. C'mon!.. who are you kidding...If you treat her the same way you treat everyone else, how does she know she is special to you? Actions speak louder remember.. So now that we've established that she needs to be treated special, let's find out exactly how to do that. Call MORE! Calling comes out as more romantic than texting. When you call her, it shows that you are thinking about her a lot, you love talking to her and that you also really care about her. Call her in the morning when she's just waking up; this will totally give her an awesome start to her day. Throughout the day you should also call like twice to check on her or just to remind her how much she means to you. Then call her just before she goes to bed and make her night. All this could be accompanied by in between texting which will obviously make her smile each tim...
2 comments
Read more