Skip to main content

THE UNSPOKEN; The Abusive Relationship 2

In most relationships the abusers are men. They usually feel like they own women and therefore have a right to treat them as they wish.
This is what they keep telling themselves...

They provoked me
It was their fault
I was angry
It's not a habit, happened just this once

These are just excuses you tell yourself to justify your actions but this just makes things move from bad to worse.

Here's what you should do;

  • Accept

You have to accept that what you are doing is not right and start looking at them as mistakes.

  • Confront

Face your mistakes and handle them. Lay the blame on yourself instead of the victim and reflect on why it happens and how to prevent it.

  • Be remorseful 

You have to apologize for your mistakes and show remorse by following up with an initiative or resolution to change.

  • Seek help 

You are eventually going to have to accept that you have a problem if it keeps on repeating itself and do something about it.
You could go for counselling or approach your parents or religious leader with the problem.

If you love them you won't hurt them.😏 



Comments

Must Reads

Long Distance Relationship

It’s the trickiest form of dating. Some people are too scared of it but others are willing to give it a try pegging a very low success rate on it. It could be the strongest relationship or the weakest…it all depends on the partners in the relationship. It has its merits and its fair share of challenges. PROS Absence makes the heart grow fonder! The love just keeps growing and it’s like falling in love a fresh each time you meet. Deep connection. Any chance to talk or meet is highly valued and appreciated. The commitment is serious and more effort is put into it. Successful. Most end up in marriage. The couple is not distracted by ‘small issues’, they are working towards a common goal and clearly know where the relationship is headed… they do everything possible to make it work. Trust . The partners trust each other and they are able to hold on to that trust to stay faithful focusing on their goals as a couple. They keep each other strong. Free. The relationsh...

The most important ingredient in Love

Some people tend to think that as long as there's love, nothing else matters. It's all they need. But how many people have been so in love but still ended up not working out... many!! It gets people wondering what could possibly be greater than love ?!?! Some people even stop believing in love thinking it's overrated. Well here's the thing about love, both partners want to feel appreciated, acknowledged, respected, understood... all that..it is what forms the bond in a relationship. But there's also that other side of every human being that doesn't want to fail, everyone wants to win or at least die trying; we all want to be right, have the superior opinions, win the arguments. It boosts our ego, makes us feel valuable, indispensable. So what happens in a relationship; what breaks them.. It's easier to receive/ take than give as it is less risky, less demanding, I mean all you have to do is sit back, relax and receive . Humans are however reciproca...

Crimes of Passion

Lately, so many cases of partners killing each other have emerged and have become very rampant. Well, it's puzzling, why would anyone want to kill someone they love so dearly.  I've been thinking about it and I have some ideas of what could be causing it. Self esteem When someone has a low opinion about themself they will tend to seek justification from the world to make them feel good about themselves. In a relationship, they will seek justification from their partner and feel that no one else can accept, understand or love them. Their partner determines their worth and without them then they think they're worthless.  This could spring from constant rejection or not getting any attention in the past. So when someone finally loves them or shows them attention, it's like they become glued. In the event of a disagreement or a looming break up, fear kicks in and the partner resorts to killing the partner because they feel without them they are worthless or no one ...